When A Loved One Needs Help, But Refuses

“My mom won’t listen.”

This is a very familiar complaint most especially when our loved one is on his/her senior years. Once we find out what the problem is, and eventually known how to manage the elder’s health, older parents often seem resistant.

This is a common issue that we must address. Here are 3 actions that may help convince older parents who resist help.

1. See for signs of memory loss/cognitive impairment.

Why spot these signs? Cognitive impairment may contribute to resistance of help. Oftentimes, decreased brain function may be a factor for resistance. This being said, aging people’s judgment can affect how they deal with logical arguments. When signs of memory loss are present, you may opt for an expert assessment and consider medical measures.

2. Be attentive to your aging parents’ emotions.

Active listening is the key. Make sure you hear and understand what they feel. Logical reasoning gets clouded when aging. This being said, it is best to avoid stressful arguments. If you can afford, visit a relationship therapist and seek an expert opinion and guidance.

3. Review your aging parents’ desires versus your own goals.

As individuals, your parents may still have their own desires, regardless of their current attitude or medical condition. It is important to weigh what they want versus the things you want for them. Oftentimes, aging individuals want autonomy and independence while we, as caring family members, aims safety and longevity for them. If you noticed, these are two opposing mindsets. Take time to list down these desires and goals. If all else fails, you can consult a relationship counselor for professional help.

Things can get really tougher…

As our parents age, things are definitely harder to handle. However, this stage is a normal part of life. We need to embrace it and deal with its difficulty. There are always support groups that can help you. Moreover, there are senior care facilities that can provide quality life to your aging loved ones, hence, balancing safety and independence.

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